Sunday, May 27, 2012

Forty-Three Months

Dear Peeper:
You are forty-three months old today, and I somehow let it get by without taking a photo of you with Mr. Panda, so we'll have to do that tomorrow.

Actually, I suspect that what happened is that I was waiting for you to have clothes on. And waiting, and waiting. By the time I did actually get you cleaned up and dressed, it was evening and we were on our way out the door to visit some friends.

Of course, when I asked if you wanted to go over there, your first question was "Are you gonna go, too?" because you've still got that separation anxiety thing going on.

At your request, we've started waiting until the last minute to tell you if we're leaving - I think we've left you two or three times this month, once or twice at Eena and Papa's, and once with Ms S. Both times, you were upset when we told you, but you got okay pretty quickly after we left, so that's progress.

I know that it's just going to take some time, and you'll eventually be right back where you were, not even giving us a kiss goodbye when we leave, but in the meantime, it sure is hard to see you so upset.

Since nursing three year olds seem to have been in the news so much this month, how about a quick check-in on your goody habits?

You are still going strong, with no indication of stopping anytime very soon, but over the past few months, you've cut back a lot during the day. I don't know exactly, because it just kind of happens and I don't usually pay a lot of attention, but I'm pretty sure that, over the past week or two, a majority of the days, you've only nursed once or twice during the daytime. Plus wake-up goody, bedtime goody, and back to sleep after getting up to potty, of course.

I actually decided last night to start making notes about when you're nursing for a few days, just to get a better idea of what you really are doing, because it's hard to remember exactly from one day to the next.

Basically, though, if we're going and doing and active, you don't even think about it, and a few times, when we've been running non-stop, you've gone all day without asking.

I can't remember the last time you nursed in public, probably at Grandma S's funeral, back in early March. I don't count MOMS Club activities with just other members around as "public" because that's like family, but I think it's been a while since you've done that, too.

I've talked to you a few times about the fact that as kids get older they don't need goody as much, and then they're big enough that they don't need goody at all. We've also talked about the fact that different kids reach that point at different ages, but that grownups and real big kids don't get goody.

When I've asked how old you think you'll be when you don't need goody anymore, the answer that I usually give (when I suggest some ages) is that you'll be four years old. Given where we are now, I suspect that's probably about right.

As for my side of the equation, I wouldn't say that I've moved into "don't offer, don't refuse" mode quite yet; it's more like "rarely offer, sometimes delay, sometimes limit duration."

I typically don't offer during the day, unless you are really cranky and whiny and obviously need your "reset" button hit. Even when you hurt yourself, I try a kiss first and that almost always works. If not, I offer Bo-Bo Bear, and that almost certainly fixes you up. If you ask to nurse for an injury, we certainly do, but you very rarely ask any more, unless you're hurt pretty badly.

I am pretty ambivalent about it all. I'm in no hurry for you to wean completely -  I love that you are still nursing, but sometimes I just don't want you to nurse right now, and, more and more, you don't want to nurse right now, anyway, so that works out fine. 

This month's highlight reel:

Mama: I'm going to take a shower. Peeper: I don't wanna shower. Mama: You don't have to because you were dry last night, but Mama's going to shower. Peeper: Why? Mama: Because I stink. Peeper: Did you pee-pee in the bed?

You were playing in the tub, pointed to some water droplets on the wall and said, "There's a picture there." "Really? What's it a picture of?" "A picture of some rain dropping!"

I told you that my birthday was coming up the next week, and you said, "Oh, Mommy and I will have to sing to you!" I asked "What else are you going to do for my birthday?" "I gonna fix the celebrate of Hannukah!"

Peeper: Get on the ground! Mommy: Why do you want me to get on the ground? Peeper: So I can push you down!

On my birthday, of all days, I overheard you telling Mommy, "Mama's chopped liver!"

You know that stuff I squirt up your nose when you're all stuffed up? You call it "sprayline."

While we were at the big annual used book sale, you were being cute or something, and Mommy asked you "Where did you come from?" You answered, loudly and proudly, "From Mama's vagina!"

A couple of days ago, you got out of the tub, got a towel, and came into the office, where I was waiting for you to tell me that you were ready to get out. I scooped you up and snugged you back into the bathroom, and on the way you said, "Oh, I am soooo warm!" I asked, "Do you mean you're so cold?" "No!" you said, "Look at me! I'm wrapped in a towel!"

In summary, you're still amazing and get more so every day.

I love you, Roodle-Toodle.


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